April 27, 2009
eight
1. So Saturday night I was watching a Medical Mystery Drama about these sick children (AND WAS THE BABYSITTER MAKING THEM SICK?) when bam the power went out. And stayed out. And then it got dark. And then I sat on my couch with the dogs and instant-messaged my favorite co-worker on my phone for two hours. And then I went to bed.
2. The power was out for eight hours total and the take-home message here is that I would be a terrible pioneer. I had TELEVISION PLANS and they were thwarted and then what the hell was I supposed to do? Other than instant-messaging on my phone and going to sleep I had absolutely no idea what I could do in the pitch dark (and no, I did not have candles because that alone would have made me a PASSABLE PIONEER).
3. The following day when the lights came back on I rolled around on the floor with a blender set to CRUSH in one hand and my fully charged and buzzing Sonicare toothbrush in the other. I watched TV and read a book and took no less than three showers. It was an orgy of electricity use and I loved every second of it.
4. Even though I immigrated to Canada three years ago I am still an American at heart and I blame her, that native-born American inside of me, for pausing between showers two and three to watch TV, browse the internet and eat waffles on the couch. Simultaneously. As the good Lord intended.
5. Amen.
kate 
Kate said,
April 30, 2009 at 2:00 pm
THE KATE (which I guess makes me “a Kate”). My life has been shrouded in an IMPENETRABLE DARKNESS since you moved to Canada! My life is once again imbued with MEANING.
Erin said,
May 1, 2009 at 11:06 pm
If watching TV, surfing the internet and eating waffles is wrong then I don’t want to be right. Viva America! (I’m a lazy American.)
kate said,
May 3, 2009 at 1:03 pm
(A) Kate! How did you get here? I am really happy to see you, especially since you are HARDLY A BLOG-UPDATING FOOL yourself.
Swistle said,
August 2, 2009 at 10:00 pm
I am so perfect to be a pioneer because I’m always in Emergency Planning Mode and so I buy ALL KINDS of stuff that I then have on hand in an emergency. But then I can’t find it, and when I DO find it, it turns out it has to be plugged in to charge first, before it can be used in a power outage.